~Links~

Christian Resources

Above Rubies

Above Rubies is a ministry to encourage women in their high calling as wives, mothers, and homemakers. Its purpose is to uphold and strengthen family life and to raise the standard of God’s truth in the nation.

Answers In Genesis

Answers in Genesis provides biblical answers to tough questions about creation, evolution, and the Bible. They features thousands of articles covering dozens of scientific and biblical topics, plus media programs, daily devotionals, resources, and much more.

Audio Bible

Listen to the King James Version of the Bible read aloud at no cost.

Blue Letter Bible

God has graciously provided BLB with over 680,000 pages of Bible study content, including: Advanced Bible Search; Concordances; Original language lexical aids; Tools for cross-referencing related Scriptures; Audio, Video, and Text Commentaries; Daily Devotionals and Reading Plans; Spanish Language Resources;Social Networking and Applications; In-depth courses through the Blue Letter Bible Institute

Daily Light on the Daily Path

A free, online, 19th century, morning & evening devotional using the words of Scripture

Faith By Hearing

Faith by Hearing is designed to collect and categorize the ever-growing availability of great Reformed and conservative evangelical audio preaching & teaching that has a high view of God and Scripture.

Generations with Vision

The vision of the [Generations Radio] progam is to present life from the perspective of a biblical worldview and within the framework of a relational model of living

Grace and Truth Books

Grace and Truth Books isn’t a Christian bookstore that follows the latest trends. We know that the truth of our Lord Jesus Christ has nothing to do with fancy packaging or attempting to resemble secular literature or media. This online Christian book store is built on a different approach: what will glorify God, strengthen His people in their walk, and call all peoples to find joy in knowing His gospel and following Him.

KJV Desktop Wallpapers

Free Downloadable Desktop Wallpapers with Scripture

Matthew Henry’s Method For Prayer

The aim of the online publication of this “old-made-new” monograph is to assist and encourage modern Christians in both public and private prayer.

National Center For Family Integrated Churches

NCFIC’s purpose is to correctly understand God’s unified vision for church and family, rightly diagnose the problems that impede this vision, and effectively communicate biblical solutions that rebuild family-affirming churches. We do not believe that family-integration is the only—or even the primary—issue in selecting or establishing a local church. But it is unquestionably a defining issue of our day as the modern church has lost the essential familistic culture that we see modeled in the New Testament.

Reformation Heritage Books

Reformation Heritage Books mission is to glorify God and strengthen His Church through the publication and distribution of Puritan and Reformed literature.

Sermon Audio

SermonAudio.com is the largest library of audio sermons on the web from conservative Christian churches and ministries with over 589,600 FREE MP3 sermons which can be streamed online for immediate listening or downloaded to your computer or MP3 player for listening at a later time. You can easily search through the entire sermon library by broadcaster, Bible reference, topic, speaker, date preached, language, or any keyword.

The Spurgeon Archive
Of particular interest are his Farm Sermons.

 

Coupon Mom



 

 

The Coupon Clippers

The Coupon Master

 

 

 

 

 

Kuntry Klippers

Living on a Dime

MoneySavingMom.com

Money Saving Mom

Price Farmer

Refund Please


Search & Win

Swagbucks

 

Gardening and Homesteading

Antiquity Oaks

Backyard Chickens

Backyard Gardener

Chiot’s Run

Christian Farm & Homestead Radio

Dave’s Garden

(Garden Watchdog)

The Garden Watchdog is a free directory of 7,547 mail order gardening companies. Gardeners share their opinions on which companies really deliver on quality, price and service.

The Deliberate Agrarian

Farm Dreams

Farm Dreams is an online community for anyone interested in sustainable farming, homesteading, prepping and living more freely and independently.

Homestead Revival

North Country Farmer

Nourishing Days

Heritage Perennials

High Country Gardens- my favorite source for mail order perennials

Jungs Seed

Pine Tree Seeds

Redeeming the Dirt

Sustainable Seed Company- certified organic heirloom seeds

Throwback At Trapper Creek

True Food Solutions

True Food Solutions is a community of people interested and involved in alternatives to the modern food economy for the production, processing, distribution, sale and consumption of food. Everyone from farmers, homesteaders, and gardeners to natural health enthusiasts and budget-conscious families can be found here.

 

 

Homemaking

Free Online Crochet Patterns

Hillbilly Housewife

Mountain Rose Herbs

National Center for Home Preservation

Pick Your Own

Ravelry

(Click through this link & get $10 off your first order. I’ll get $10 off my next order if you do so I thank you kindly!)

Vitacost.com has the best selection of health foods and snacks, bath and body products, natural household supplies, baby care essentials–plus, of course, discount vitamins, minerals, herbs, sports nutrition supplements and other formulas for your nutritional needs. You’ll find nearly 40,000 products that help you care for yourself, your family, your pets and your home

 

Homeschooling

An Old Fashioned Education

Charlotte Mason in Modern English

Classical Christian Education

 

 

Clicks for Homeschooling

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Handbook of Nature Study

Homeschool Buyers Co-op

 

 

 

Homeschool Buyers Co-Op

 

 

 

 

Homeschool in the Woods

 

 

 

 

 

HSLDA

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nature Friend Magazine

 

 

Parental Rights

Simply Charlotte Mason

The Old Schoolhouse Magazine
The Old Schoolhouse Magazine

Trivium Pursuit

 

Blog Reading

Raising Arrows

Raising Homemakers

Renaissance

Simply Charlotte Mason Blog 

Sunnyside Farm

  • Sarah Dutko

    Hi,
    I feel that I need to write this because I’m very disturbed to see that you are endorsing L(ynne) Elizabeth Krueger’s book on your website. See, I KNOW Mrs. Krueger. I grew up with her and her children: for 8 years I (and my family) were a part of the same fundamentalist cult that she and her family still belong to. I’d like to provide some valuable perspective on what it is like to grow up under this kind of child “training”, and the kind of damage it does to children.

    Mrs. Krueger’s child-training methods are not original to her, or just “common sense”, as she claims: they come directly from a man named Joe LaQuiere, who was the leader of our cult (up until he died this past year), which was and is an insular, legalistic group with neo-Jewish practices, such as eating no pork products, celebrating the Sabbath (Saturday), condemnation of Christmas trees for being “pagan”, as well as using emotional, spiritual, and physical abuse to control its members. Having lived through it from age 6 to 14, and having family members who are still a part of this cult, gives me a unique insider’s perspective, which will hopefully provide you with enough information about the damaging and evil results of this method of “child-training” that you will help in warning against it, as it has become far too popular in the ultra-conservative, homeschooling movement, which is beginning to see a whole generation of survivors speak up about the abuses they’ve experienced, and give warning to the dangers inherent to the homeschooling community.

    I don’t have my copy of the book to refer to (I threw it away long ago, after receiving it as a wedding present from my mom, who still partly adheres to these methods), so I am going to quote here from an article written by Mrs. Krueger, who, in her online presence, refers to herself by her middle name “Elizabeth” (though I know her as Lynne Krueger, and that is her first name). The website “Atriptothewoodshed.com” was the earlier incarnation of her present website, RaisingGodlyTomatoes.com (which is where the link will send you now if you try to go there). I imagine the name was changed to make the concept more “user-friendly” for those who aren’t already fans of corporal punishment. In any case, this article is from “Christian Moms of Many Blessings” (http://www.cmomb.com/child-training/) and was written around the same time as this book. I quote a portion of what Mrs. Krueger writes:

    “Don’t be afraid of a confrontation. It is helpful to set up a confrontational situation in the case of a toliler [my note: I think this is a typo for "toddler"] who is “out of control.” For example, tell him to sit on the couch next to you. When he tries to get down, give him a firm swat on the bottom and say, “No” in an `I mean business’ tone. Continue this every time he tries to get down until he stops trying. If he actually makes it off the couch, tell him to climb back up himself, if he is big enough, or replace him if needed. Don’t restrain him. Don’t give in. Ignore his crying. You are not done until he sits there quietly for as long as you want him to without resisting. Let him fall asleep if he likes. Even after he stops resisting, don’t let him down too soon. Ten or 20 minutes or even an hour is not too long. Once you have done this, continue to expect him to obey everything you tell him to do.”

    This particular method of training young toddlers, as young as one year old, was used on my little brother, Joshua, during one of the “training sessions” that Mrs. Krueger’s mentor, Joe LaQuiere, used in order to teach his followers how to train “obedient” children. Joshua was made to sit on my mom or dad’s lap, and spanked every time he tried to get down. He was a bright and happy baby, but very stubborn. He didn’t want to give in, but kept on trying to get down, and getting spanked for it, over, and over, and over, and over. He’d cry and cry, but he wasn’t allowed to be comforted until he “submitted” and gave in. The goal was to get him to “sit there quietly for as long as you want him to without resisting”, as Mrs. Krueger wrote. This “training” session started in the afternoon, and went on…all afternoon…and evening…late into the night. It was 2 or 3 in the morning before Joe LaQuiere okay-ed stopping for the night. At this point they had been “training” him to sit still and not cry for over 6 hours. He was not allowed to nurse during this time, or to see his mother (my mom), because that would “comfort him”, and they wanted him to be miserable until he gave in and obeyed. You may think “a small swat on the bottom” does not sound over-the-top for a small toddler as a way to get them to sit quietly (as if toddlers were created to “sit quietly” – their nature, and their developmental needs, as any child psychologist can tell you, require them to explore, not sit quietly for hours). What about spanking them over…and over…and over…for 6 hours straight? Does that sound abusive? Mrs. Krueger’s methods (really, Joe LaQuiere’s methods) say that you CANNOT GIVE UP until your child (or baby) submits to you and obeys, no matter now long that takes. If it takes all night, so be it. If it takes dozens, or a hundred spankings, so be it. This is not training, this is child abuse. My one-year-old brother Josh was subjected to this “training” day after day, until he finally, sullenly, gave in, and was now a “well-trained” baby, who would sit quietly on demand, and not try to get down and play in normal toddler fashion. In a few short months, he went from a bubbly, laughing one-year-old to a quiet, sullen, baby who rarely smiled. He was mostly silent from then on: he didn’t speak until he was nearly 4. Joe LaQuiere, (who, remember, is Mrs. Krueger’s mentor, and the one who taught her these methods) said Joshua was an exceptionally “rebellious” baby, and it was necessary to discipline the “rebelliousness” out of him until his will was broken.

    See, Mrs. Krueger’s book, and her advice, is really the somewhat-milder face of Joe LaQuiere’s teaching: the public face, if you will. She watched more violent abuse occur, and was taught that it was acceptable: babies having their faces stuffed into couch cushions to teach them not to cry – children being beaten mercilessly with “The Paddle”, not once, as she writes in her book, but often 20 or 30 times. Children being dragged by their hair, thrown against walls, or dangled in the air by their throats. My own siblings endured all of these abuses, and I was made to watch.

    Mrs. Krueger, whether or not she treated her own children quite this severely, watched this abuse happen to other children, and agreed with it. Her book is merely the milder, public face of private child abuse, because she knows that some of the stricter methods taught by Joe LaQuiere would be too unpalatable to put in print, as well as likely to land her (and him) in trouble with law enforcement. But make no mistake that it occurs. To be fair, Mrs. Krueger and her husband I don’t believe followed every child “training” (abuse) method that Joe LaQuiere taught: she and her family are best friends with him (one of her daughters is even married to one of Joe LaQuiere’s sons), and while their methods differ somewhat in severity, the principle is the same: OBEDIENCE is paramount, and it is of little importance HOW you get your children to obey, or how often you must beat them, as long as the end result is IMMEDIATE, UNQUESTIONING obedience, from children of any age, even through adulthood. THIS is the goal (which is in itself a very bad goal) and the methods used to achieve it, as touted by Joe LaQuiere, through the mouthpiece of Mrs. Krueger, are cruel and damaging.

    To this day, I suffer panic attacks and horrible flashbacks to watching my brothers and sisters abused through this method of child-rearing. I grew up emotionally-stunted, being taught that ‘a cheerful face’ was the only acceptable expression, and that any negative emotions I felt, like anger, or sadness, or frustration, were sin, and needed to be corrected. Thus I learned to disassociate myself from my emotions, effectively divorcing them from my conscious mind, which is a process I am still trying, with the help of therapy, to undo. The children, including those in my family, who grew up under these methods, are emotionally unstable; are fearful of and often unable to make their own decisions; are unable to move into independent adulthood without the constant guidance of parents telling them what to do; and worst of all, have a false and damaging picture of who God is, and who they are meant to be.

    After leaving the cult that Mrs. Krueger belongs to, I was confused, depressed, and suicidal. I believed that God was an angry God who despised me for not reaching His standards of perfection. I learned nothing about grace through this experience. Thank God, I discovered it after I left, and realized that God does not treat us like Joe LaQuiere and Mrs. Krueger do their children: punishing every crime and dealing out justice until we are perfect. Instead, He already provided the perfect righteousness that we can never achieve through Jesus, and gave us in one fell swoop, a perfect record and status with him, and complete forgiveness of all sins, past and future! He doesn’t demand perfect performance from us to gain His acceptance. We are not “spanked” until we learn to obey Him instantly, with no questions, and with a false smile. Instead, He loves on us, extravagantly, and at great personal cost to Himself, in order to draw us to Himself…by LOVE. LOVE is what calls us to CHOOSE to obey Him – not repeated punishment, or the fear that He will only “enjoy us” as long as we fulfill the letter of His law. THIS is how we need to treat our children: with the same mercy and grace that God showers on us. To follow Mrs. Krueger’s method instead will give our children an outward layer of “goodness”, on which they think their acceptance by God depends, while inwardly they remain full of sin and darkness, needing God’s redeeming love and GRACE to flood in and wash them clean! Mrs. Krueger’s book and methods create little Pharisees: looking pretty good on the outside, but with aching hearts inside, knowing the misery of never being “good enough”. Thank God we don’t HAVE to be “good enough” for Him: we already are, thanks to the sacrifice He made for us!

    Please PLEASE do not recommend this book to your readers: encourage them instead to try something like “Families where Grace is in Place”, or “Give Them Grace: Dazzling Your Children with the Love of Jesus” both EXCELLENT books!

    If you have any questions, or would like to ask me specifics about why Mrs. Krueger’s methods are so damaging, please feel free to email me at sarah.dutko77@gmail.com! I’d love to talk with you :)

    Wishing you all the best,

    Sarah Dutko

    • http://www.reformationacres.com/ Quinn

      Dear Sarah,
      I’m so terribly sorry to read of your dreadful experiences growing up! Thank you for sharing them here for the benefit of others, painful though that had to be.

      Upon your suggestion, I removed the link and others that were old and gone or aren’t updated. (I’ve been writing for many years here and don’t often update this page.)

      May it be a consolation to you that while I do still find the concept behind “tomato staking” helpful in parenting-(the part where if you’re dealing with a child going through a rough streak, it’s beneficial to keep them nearby where you can help them work through their issues. I’ve found that the bit of extra attention, conversation, and relationship building is often enough to set them back on the right path) that the methods were never really employed too much in our home.

      May God have spared any others from finding the link through this site and the confusion, harsh leading to abusive discipline methods, and broken spirits it can lead to. And if I did dabble with the methods, may my children never remember it! I trust in His mercy that He can and will do so!

      I whole-heartedly agree with you that the end of this and other outcomes-based, first time obedience oriented, and systematic training of children (including the works of No Greater Joy ministries- which sounds very similar to the man you speak of) is legalistic phariseeism and a burden to parents and worse to their children. There is nothing that we can do to get our children saved. Period. No discipline methods. No training flow charts. No character studies. Etc… Realizing that was incredibly freeing to me and actually made sharing the gospel with my children much more natural, personal, and was done with more zeal.

      My two most recommended resources for parenting right now are Parenting by the Promises of God by Joel Beeke and the works of Charlotte Mason. While the latter though is geared towards their education, it teaches us to gently lead and nurture our children respecting them as whole, individual persons created in the image of God and not extensions or reflections of ourselves.

      Once again Sarah, thank you so much for bringing this to my attention. I am praying for the continued recovery of yourself and your siblings. May the Lord be pleased to give you such peace and joy through the rest of your life that the former things pass away as a far distant and cloudy bad dream.

      Your Sister,
      Quinn

      **NOTE: To anyone else reading here, please do realize that as a Christian, I am on a path of sanctification and growing in Christ over the course of time. It is nearly impossible for me to go back and review all of my old material to remove things I no longer endorse. If you have a question or concern about something you find, please feel free to ask!

      • Sarah Dutko

        Dear Quinn,

        Thank you so much for your kind reply back! It was very encouraging to me to hear how you were able to pull something good from your experiences with the book and leave the rest behind, and the positives of your subsequent journey with your children! I’m with you in realizing that we can’t do anything to get our kids saved – it’s a huge burden lifted to know that God is control of that, as He is circumstances in our own lives! I know I’ve seen Him work so much in my life and the lives of my family, and I know He can redeem anything :)

        Thank you so much for hearing my heart, and responding back with such graciousness and love! You made me smile when I read your message :)

        Love and grace to you and your family!

        Sarah